Time

A.J hasn’t left my side since he’s left my womb and I still feel like we don’t spend enough time together. Isn’t that CRAZY?! I feel like time is speeding by me and I just want to stop and take a breath. He’s growing, I’m growing, school is going by, my spirituality is doubling in size as are my responsibilities. It’s so overwhelming.

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Baby, I want you to know that Mommys trying her hardest to balance everything. I wish I could spend all my time and focus on you but my salvation depends on my dedication to God and Daddy depends on me too. Don’t fret. Mommy always makes time for you and only you. Just take your time to grow angel. I don’t want to miss a thing. Te amo.

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Out of place

I have been feeling so out of whack & so out of place for a long time. Staying with my mother-in-law has been hell and sometimes she makes me feel like an inadequate mother and wife. I hate it. At church, I get judgmental looks for breastfeeding, not dressing modestly (I try but very few things fit me since birth) and for my sons car seat taking up space in the church van. Some woman even said it wasn’t fair. I mean really, am I supposed to risk my sons life so she can sit next to her husband? Get over it. Everyone makes me feel unwelcome & it really gets to me. The only time I ever feel absolutely right-at-home: with my husband & my son.

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A.J really is the light of my life. He’s the only one who can love me unconditionally & I feel like a superwoman with him. He’s three months now & my how the time has flown. My small baby wants to talk & walk already & I feel accomplished. He loves to sleep all the time but when he’s awake, he’s a blast. I just want to thank The Lord everyday for him & I ask Him to teach my son of his everlasting love.

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God bless.